Mastering the Art of Persuasion & Healthy Communication: Recognizing Communication Needs
One of the first steps in mastering the art of healthy communication is to learn how to listen so people will talk. Improving your ability to listen so people will talk is a key step in helping you to use your influence to change your world.
Improving your ability to listen so people will talk also enhances your skills to use your positive influence to change your world for the better.
The way a person structures their communication gives you valuable information about how to structure your communication in response. You can recognize communication needs by noticing communication style.
Before I can tell you about needs-style, I need you to make an important distinction between behavior and personality. I want you to avoid the trap of putting people into personality boxes and then treating them like your box is their personality. Why is it a trap? Because personality is a generalization, based on limited information.
Behavior changes, depending on variables in the communication environment. People have a variety of behaviors to draw on, depending on who they’re with, what’s going on, and most importantly, what’s important to them at any particular moment in time.
I’m sure you’ve heard the saying, ‘Think outside the box.” Here’s my version of that. “Don’t get in the box in the first place.” In future posts, I’m going to share with you a model for quickly hearing what a person needs in their interactions with you. It is not based on personality types. It is based on behavior, and because behavior changes, you are required to keep paying attention in order to notice those changes.
A thought to start the week with:
Change your mind. Change your life. Change your world.
Rick is a best selling author and the founder of the Art of Change Skills for Life. His book titles include, Dealing with People You Can’t Stand: How to bring out the best in people at their worst, Life by Design and Influence and the Art of Persuasion. These days he is spending quality time away from the spotlight enjoying the company of his wife and practicing his electric guitar.