The Art of Change Skills for Life

Ideas. Insight. Inspiration.

If All You Know Is What You Don’t Want…

September 13, 2010 Life Skills Persuasion 2

If all you know is what you don’t want, you will get more of it.

That idea never gets old for me.  It’s based on the fact that our ability to pay attention is limited, and that our nervous system is wired for relevancy.  So whatever you pay attention to, your brain will illustrate it for you consistently.

As an observer and student of human nature, I confess that I like knowing about and understanding the dark side of people, the lesser angels of our nature. I want to understand not just who we aspire to be, but also who we believe ourselves to be.

I noticed a long time ago that this Earth is a hard, hard place for the human race. Fear and stress tend to bring out the worst in us, in some people more, in some people less, but in all of us to some degree.   And I think it’s good to pay attention, be self directed and be resourceful when contemplating the  challenges of the world around us, and specifically when engaging with our fellow human beings.

That dark side is something that all human beings have in common.  So in an ironic way, we are united by one of the very things that divide us.

Now,  I don’t want to sound negative about this. And I don’t have to, so we’re in luck!  Because if there is a choice to be made between the difficulty of life and the desire for fulfillment, knowing what you do want  can bring you back into the light, where you’ll find the better angels of human nature, including yours, I’ve observed that there is that most everyone, given a chance, chooses to be happy and live a good life.  Everybody else could  be kept out of positions of authority, and otherwise left to their own business.

What choice are you making?  Comments?  Here’s a link to some uplifting quotes about the importance of knowing what you want.

Be well

Rick

 

2 Responses

  1. rita says:

    Rick,
    first of all – this is a late HAPPY BIRTHDAY wish from Europe! All the best for your next year in helath and may your dreams come true – rather, make some true!

    I chose to let go of my past in which I played a fix-role which could not be (ex)changed or improved.
    I did a little thing to change it and that is all I can do. When finishing my book about it, lately and due to now re-reading it, I understand suddenly that my inner fight was about being stuck in an unchangable position for good.
    UNDERSTANDING this fight, which cannot be won, does help letting go. It is sad ´cuz it does make me “feel” like a loser, without change, but that is the way it is. I won by noticing it.
    Now I plan to get the good part out of it!!!

    all the best,
    rita

    • Thank you for the birthday greeting, Rita! Not sure what understanding you are specifically referencing, but if your increase in self awareness leads to new attitudes and behaviors that take you down a more fulfilling path, then it seems you have won rather than lost!

      Be well
      Rick

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